That’s the “other” nickname for the Hoosier State.
Apparently more Interstate Highways cross through this state than any other.
It ought to however, be called “The Skull and Crossbones of America.”
Every time I get on the highway here I risk my life.
I had a doctor’s appointment today…. (Yes, I did get my Ambien back!)
But by the time I made the 30 minute trip there and back again I think I was nearly run off the road 3 times by some dumbass trucker.
Ever notice the “look” they give you after they’ve nearly killed you.
One perv actually had his digital camera out and snapped my picture!
No worries…I gave him a good shot!
Oh well…at least I’ll sleep well tonight.
Nighty, night!
Monday, January 9, 2006
Sunday, January 8, 2006
The Pilch
The Pilcher’s have been close friends of ours for close to 13 years.
They are, in a word, a hoot!
Pilch (John) can drink anyone under the table,
And he’s and old sod!
Famous Grouse, a blended Scotch Whiskey, is his cocktail of choice.
Dawn likes her Wine although it does tend to make her a bit loopey.
Pilch merely goes to sleep at 8p.m. each evening…
Dawn can go the distance all night!
The Pilcher’s moved back to his native England last year.
It’s not like things are very different between us.
Our relationship in recent years has been sustained (mostly) via Email;
I just received one today and I got a real chuckle out of it.
It appears that the Pilcher’s went back to Houston in October to visit old friends.
They found that the price of Famous Grouse went down by 4 bucks a bottle since they left!
Apparently the Houston economy misses Pilch as much as we do!
Here’s to ya Pilch!
Cling, cling.
They are, in a word, a hoot!
Pilch (John) can drink anyone under the table,
And he’s and old sod!
Famous Grouse, a blended Scotch Whiskey, is his cocktail of choice.
Dawn likes her Wine although it does tend to make her a bit loopey.
Pilch merely goes to sleep at 8p.m. each evening…
Dawn can go the distance all night!
The Pilcher’s moved back to his native England last year.
It’s not like things are very different between us.
Our relationship in recent years has been sustained (mostly) via Email;
I just received one today and I got a real chuckle out of it.
It appears that the Pilcher’s went back to Houston in October to visit old friends.
They found that the price of Famous Grouse went down by 4 bucks a bottle since they left!
Apparently the Houston economy misses Pilch as much as we do!
Here’s to ya Pilch!
Cling, cling.
Friday, January 6, 2006
Check Yes or No
It started way back in third grade.
I used to sit beside Emily.
Had on a pink dress, a matching bow, and her pony tail. She kissed me on the school bus, but told me not to tell.
Next day I chased her round the playground.
Across the monkey bars, to the merry-go-round.
And Emily got caught passing me a note.
Before the teacher took it, I read what she wrote.
Do you love me, do you wanna be my friend?
And if you do,
well then don't be afraid to take me by the hand If you want to.
I think this is how love goes,
check yes or no.
(Check Yes or No by George Strait)
And so it begins.
The doorbell rang a few minutes ago and little Miss Emily from across the street had this note for Nick.
Initially, he wrote in “kinda”.
But given the strong influence of his sister,
He begrudgingly changed it to “Yes”.
Poor kid…
He’ll never be allowed to choose his own wife.
Not while Jordie’s around!
A Cowboy and his Wife’s Bra…
This was sent to me by my friend Mary. I just HAD to share! Enjoy.
I ain't much for shopping,
Or for goin' into town
Except at cattle-shipping time,
I ain't too easily found.
But the day came when I had to go
I left the kids with Ma.
But 'fore I left, she asked me,
"Would you pick me up a bra?"
So without thinkin' I said, "Sure,"
How tough could that job be?
An' I bent down and kissed her
An' said, "I'll be back by three.
"
Well, I done the things I needed,
But I started to regret
Ever offering to buy that thing
I worked me up a sweat
I walked into the ladies' shop
My hat pulled over my eyes,
I didn't want to take a
On bein' recognized.
I walked up to the sales clerk
I didn't hem or haw
I told that lady right straight out,
"I'm here to buy a bra."
From behind I heard some snickers,
So I turned around to see
Every woman in that store
Was a'gawkin' right at me!
"What kind would you be looking for?"
Well, I just scratched my head.
I'd only seen one kind before,
"Thought bras was bras," I said.
She gave me a disgusted look,
"Well sir, that's where you're wrong.
Follow me," I heard her say,
Like a dog, I tagged along.
She took me down this alley
Where bras was on display.
I thought my jaw would hit the floor
When I saw that lingerie.
They had all these different styles
That I'd never seen before
I thought I'd go plumb crazy
'fore I left that women's store.
They had bras you wear for eighteen hours
And bras that cross your heart.
There was bras that lift and separate,
And that was just the start.
They had bras that made you feel
Like you ain't wearing one at all,
And bras that you can train in
When you start off when you're small.
Well, I finally made my mind up
Picked a black and lacy one
I told the lady, "Bag it up,"
And figured I was done.
But then she asked me for the size
I didn't hesitate
I knew that measurement by heart,
"A six-and-seven-eighths."
"Six and seven eighths you say?
That really isn't right."
"Oh, yes ma'am! I'm real positive
I measured them last night!"
I thought that she'd go into shock,
Musta took her by surprise
When I told her that my wife's bust
Was the same as my hat size.
"That's what I used to measure with,
I figured it was fair,
But if I'm wrong, I'm sorry ma'am."
This drew another stare.
By now a crowd had gathered
And they all was crackin' up
When the lady asked to see my hat,
To measure for the cup.
When she finally had it figured,
I gave the gal her pay.
Then I turned to leave the store,
Tipped my hat and said, "Good day."
My wife had heard the story
'fore I ever made it home.
She'd talked to fifteen women
Who called her on the phone.
She was still a-laughin'
But by then I didn't care.
Now she don't ask and I don't shop
For women's underwear.
~ Author Unknown
I ain't much for shopping,
Or for goin' into town
Except at cattle-shipping time,
I ain't too easily found.
But the day came when I had to go
I left the kids with Ma.
But 'fore I left, she asked me,
"Would you pick me up a bra?"
So without thinkin' I said, "Sure,"
How tough could that job be?
An' I bent down and kissed her
An' said, "I'll be back by three.
"
Well, I done the things I needed,
But I started to regret
Ever offering to buy that thing
I worked me up a sweat
I walked into the ladies' shop
My hat pulled over my eyes,
I didn't want to take a
On bein' recognized.
I walked up to the sales clerk
I didn't hem or haw
I told that lady right straight out,
"I'm here to buy a bra."
From behind I heard some snickers,
So I turned around to see
Every woman in that store
Was a'gawkin' right at me!
"What kind would you be looking for?"
Well, I just scratched my head.
I'd only seen one kind before,
"Thought bras was bras," I said.
She gave me a disgusted look,
"Well sir, that's where you're wrong.
Follow me," I heard her say,
Like a dog, I tagged along.
She took me down this alley
Where bras was on display.
I thought my jaw would hit the floor
When I saw that lingerie.
They had all these different styles
That I'd never seen before
I thought I'd go plumb crazy
'fore I left that women's store.
They had bras you wear for eighteen hours
And bras that cross your heart.
There was bras that lift and separate,
And that was just the start.
They had bras that made you feel
Like you ain't wearing one at all,
And bras that you can train in
When you start off when you're small.
Well, I finally made my mind up
Picked a black and lacy one
I told the lady, "Bag it up,"
And figured I was done.
But then she asked me for the size
I didn't hesitate
I knew that measurement by heart,
"A six-and-seven-eighths."
"Six and seven eighths you say?
That really isn't right."
"Oh, yes ma'am! I'm real positive
I measured them last night!"
I thought that she'd go into shock,
Musta took her by surprise
When I told her that my wife's bust
Was the same as my hat size.
"That's what I used to measure with,
I figured it was fair,
But if I'm wrong, I'm sorry ma'am."
This drew another stare.
By now a crowd had gathered
And they all was crackin' up
When the lady asked to see my hat,
To measure for the cup.
When she finally had it figured,
I gave the gal her pay.
Then I turned to leave the store,
Tipped my hat and said, "Good day."
My wife had heard the story
'fore I ever made it home.
She'd talked to fifteen women
Who called her on the phone.
She was still a-laughin'
But by then I didn't care.
Now she don't ask and I don't shop
For women's underwear.
~ Author Unknown
Thursday, January 5, 2006
The Indy Monster
“Mom, come quick” Nick yelled the other day.
“Arghhhhh.”
I was in the middle of doing my hair which is as rare as a Peace Treaty in the Middle East.
“What do you need?” I screamed back. (You’d think we live in a Palace.)
“I think I see a Monster in the pond! One like Nelly, come quick!”
By now the curling iron was so entangled in my hair, I had to unplug it and take it with me down the hall at a pace this body has not hit since I used to ding-dong-digit.
“Here I am, show me” I said, feigning enthusiasm (and gasping for air).
“You missed it. It had a big long tail on it with no hair.”
“Must have been a beaver” I suggested.
“Nope, it was way bigger than a beaver” Nick insisted.
And the thing is, he said it with such authority… that now when I’m home alone dinking around the house, I can’t help but keep one eye on that pond.
After all… I hear Nelly’s still on the loose!
“Arghhhhh.”
I was in the middle of doing my hair which is as rare as a Peace Treaty in the Middle East.
“What do you need?” I screamed back. (You’d think we live in a Palace.)
“I think I see a Monster in the pond! One like Nelly, come quick!”
By now the curling iron was so entangled in my hair, I had to unplug it and take it with me down the hall at a pace this body has not hit since I used to ding-dong-digit.
“Here I am, show me” I said, feigning enthusiasm (and gasping for air).
“You missed it. It had a big long tail on it with no hair.”
“Must have been a beaver” I suggested.
“Nope, it was way bigger than a beaver” Nick insisted.
And the thing is, he said it with such authority… that now when I’m home alone dinking around the house, I can’t help but keep one eye on that pond.
After all… I hear Nelly’s still on the loose!
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