Vacuuming Sucks…Literally

My family thinks I’m anal.
OCD is another term they like to throw around.
This morning…I played right into their accusations!

It was 4a.m. and I couldn’t sleep.
(Did I mention I’m an insomniac as well?!?)
So I started cleaning the house.
Really cleaning the house.

One might even suggest I got carried away.
I’m a vacuum freak; I’ll vacuum anything or anyone.
Today…the top of the gas range seemed like a good idea.

Warning to all other vacuum freaks.
DO NOT VACCUM THE GAS STOVE.
REPEAT…
DO NOT VACCUM THE GAS STOVE.

Funny thing about fire and how fast it travels.
Apparently the force of the vacuum sucked the pilot light right into the end of my hose.
It was quite a light show…trust me on this one!

So now the Oreck sits in the middle of my kitchen as I down my 4th cup of Joe. Something tells me it’s not going anywhere and I’m going to have a long day.

Indy-annoying

As hard as I try to like it here,
This place just begs to be made fun of.

Today’s case in point…
I saw not one, but two motorcycle cops.
Now that alone would be funny,
It was after all only 22 degrees here today.
But add to these cycles a sidecar,
And I split a gut!

When was the last time you actually saw a sidecar?
For me, it had to be in a Monty Python movie.
In fact, I think it was a cops and robber scene!

But in defense of the rest of India-no-place …
There was no passenger Cop riding in it.
Must have been a slow crime day.

Vroom, vroom!

Good St. Nick

Nicholas continues to blow my mind.

Yesterday, we as a family attended a very difficult funeral service for our friend and neighbor.
When the Pastor asked for volunteers to come forward and share their thoughts and memories about Dave, there was an uncomfortable delay.

Suddenly, Nick’s arm shot up.
I panicked, and Mike swatted his arm down.
What could he possibly have to say that would comfort the family?
He pleaded with us to let him go up.
Again, we thought better of it and denied him.

Later on the long ride home, I asked him.
“What were you going to say up there Nicholas?”
He told us that he was going to say that he didn’t know “Mr. Dave” all that well yet. But he knew that he loved his kids more than anything in the world.
And their dog Mocha.

Maybe we should have let him.

Solar Powered Jaw

Occasionally, I can be very chatty before daybreak.
Today was such an occasion.

The kids were up early checking the news hoping for a snow day.
Mike already knew there would be a two hour delay and hollered for them to go back to bed.

In my mind…Game On.

I started chattin Mike up about the day ahead.
“Hey, I’ve got an idea” I told him.

No response.

“Let’s try that new Thai place for lunch today.”

No response.

“Mike, are you asleep?”

Finally…a response.
Just not the one I was looking for.

“Chrissy”, he said.
“Pretend your jaw is solar powered.
No daylight, no talking.”

So now …I’m vewy, vewy quiet;
I’m hunting Mikey!!!

Sweet Memories

Is there anything better than holiday baking?
Ok…yes, plenty!
I don’t know about your culinary prowess, but mine is lacking.
I’ve never had a Gingerbread Man come out that doesn’t end up looking obscene.
In fact…one year I made them obscene on purpose as a defense against accusations. (You know who you are!!!)

Ahhh yes, the good ol’ days.
That was sans “boat anchors”, Mike’s new endearing term for our children.
A bottle of wine, some food coloring, a few sprinkles…
Oh the possibilities!
(And obviously probabilities; we do have those kids now!)

But now we make new memories.
Gingerbread houses to go with the "proper" little men.
Pretzels dipped in chocolate and rolled in nuts.
You can’t imagine the mess!
Or hopefully you can…
Because you and yours are making your own Sweet Memories this holiday season!

Cheers!