Do You Believe?

I do.

I believe in positive thinking.
I believe in the power of prayer.
I believe in good juju.
I believe in Yin and Yang.
I believe in good versus evil.
I believe in miracles.

I have to.
Because one, or more, or all of the above is working.

I don’t know which.
I don’t particularly care which.
I am an equal opportunity believer.

TC is getting better.

I am going to type that again; TC is getting better.

We’ve been suspicious for a month or so.
She just all of a sudden got up out of bed!
She has an appetite!
She has an opinion!
Her eyes are blue again!
We are dumbfounded!

We had reason to be skeptical.
The Hospice nurses had warned us to “watch for a rally” near the end.
And we thought the end was near.
Very, very near.

In fact, we were so confused by TC’s behavior that we didn’t even talk about it amongst ourselves.
We were scared.
Scared perhaps that it was indeed the “end” rally; none of it made sense and we didn’t want to question it.
We didn’t want to jinx it.
We didn’t want it to go away.

We wanted… to believe.

But this is not the kind of rally Hospice was referring to.
This is the real deal.
This is the (dare I say it), “Lance- Armstrong-How-Do-You-Like-Them-Apples” kind of rally.
We have proof.

TC went to see her oncologist, Dr. Kahn on Thursday.
She “walked” into his office unassisted.
He has not seen her out of a wheelchair in many months.
Before he could even register a reaction…
She danced the Irish Jig. (OK, maybe just a few steps…but she danced!)
Dad, who was with her, said Dr. Kahn’s face was priceless.
Total shock, the man was speechless!

It was then that he told TC they, (he and his staff), did not think TC would live to see January.
He examined her and based on a couple of observations, declared her tumors are shrinking!

Hallelujah…hallelujah!

The reason for this stunning reversal is a drug called Faslodex.
When TC stopped all aggressive treatment back in November, Dr. Kahn had one more trick up his sleeve.
Neither he, nor any other doctors at KU, had ever tried Faslodex, which is a (bare with me now) estrogen receptor antagonist.
Although approved by the FDA in 2002, there have been only 2 clinical trials (worldwide) to date which have included just 851 women with advanced metastatic breast cancer.

Today, KU has two more women (who have stopped responding to traditional breast cancer treatments) taking Faslodex.
It is administered once a month as an intramuscular injection (yes, in the ass) which takes between 5 and 10 minutes to administer, but as TC says… it beats the shit out of chemo!

TC is scheduled for a body scan in May.
This will of course give us more tangible data.
In the meantime, we can waste valuable time waiting on and worrying about test results.
Or, we can embrace every good day we’ve been given “back” with her.

I believe I’ll embrace.
After all…
It would be bad juju not to!