Holy Cow!

I went to the County Fair last night.
The temperature was over 100 degrees with 56% humidity.
Brutal.

I’ve not yet absorbed all that I witnessed.
I think I’m still in denial.
Suffice it to say the human oddities were out in force.

For your entertainment,
Here are some early thoughts and observations from the fair.

Eighteen:

Number of men I counted in Bib Overalls with no shirt on underneath.
And trust me on this, they really needed a shirt on.

“Party like a Country Girl”:

My favorite T-shirt.
It was worn by a pimply faced teenager who was 8 months pregnant.
Party on darlin.

5 bucks for a funnel cake:

5 bucks!
Man…you get a typical redneck family of 13 loadin up on them badboys and you got yourself half of this month’s trailer park payment.

Bubba:

What’s a county fair without half a dozen Bubba’s?
We of course pronounce our own beloved Bubba,” Boo-ba”.
He’s a cut above the rest!

Buck a Ride Night:

Now here’s a new parenting low point for me.
Apparently, the rides are only a buck on opening night.
That’s when the Carnies “test-drive” their equipment.
They watch for things like nuts and bolts flying off that might cause our little darlings to propel hundreds of feet into the air only to land (hopefully) in a pile of horse dung.
If no one is injured or maimed, mission accomplished and the cost of the ride goes up to 3 bucks the next night.
Good old fashioned risk vs. reward.

Most valuable lesson learned:

Never, ever have a facial the day of the County Fair.
My recently cleaned and open pours were quickly filled with billions of tiny little particles of bullshit floating through the country air!

And horse shit and goat shit and chicken shit………….